Rumors
By Neil Simon
Directed By Paul Archibeque
Show Dates February 27 – March 14, 2026

PLEASE READ ALL THE AUDITION DETAILS BELOW

At a large, tastefully-appointed Sneden’s Landing townhouse, the Deputy Mayor of New York has just shot himself. Though it’s only a flesh wound, Charlie Brock’s self-inflicted injury sets off a series of events causing four couples to experience a severe attack of farce.

As their tenth wedding anniversary party commences, Charlie lies bleeding in another room, and his wife Myra is nowhere in sight. The first guests, lawyer Ken Gorman and his wife Chris, scramble to get “the story” straight before the other guests arrive. As the confusion and miscommunications mount, the evening spins off into classic farcical hilarity.

For the audition:

– Please sign up for one audition slot HERE.

– Auditions will be held in the BLT LOBBY. Come in through the front of the building to check in.

– Full rehearsals won’t begin until January 5th but once cast I’d like to have two read throughs in December before the holidays.

– Please read the play before auditioning. You can find the script here: RUMORS SCRIPT

– Auditions will consist of cold readings from the script. No need to be memorized but take a look at the audition sides here: RUMORS SIDES

CHARACTER DESCRIPTIONS (ages are flexible):

Chris Gorman: F, 30s-40s — Ken’s elegant and attractive wife. A bit high strung.

Ken Gorman: M, 30s-40s — A well-spoken, handsome attorney. A bit high strung.

Claire Ganz: F, 30s-40s — Lenny’s gossipy wife. Close friends with Claire.

Lenny Ganz: M, 30s-40s — An accountant who has just wrecked his brand new BMW. Irascible, sarcastic, and very likeable.

Ernie Cusack: M, 40s-50s — A psychiatrist.

Cookie Cusack: F, 40s-50s — Ernie’s wife and a cooking show host with a bad back. She has a very dramatic, physical personality.

Glenn Cooper: M, 30s-40s — An ambitious, polished man preparing for a run for the state senate.

Cassie Cooper: F, 20s-30s — A jealous type who believes in the healing power of crystals. Glenn’s trophy wife. Insecure, sexy.

Officer Welch: M, 30s-50s — A vigorous, straight-talking, veteran police officer.

Officer Pudney: M or F, 20s-30s — A rookie cop.

– Wear comfy clothes and be prepared to move and play.

– If you have any questions feel free to reach out to archibeque@earthlink.net.